Monday, February 28, 2011

The Faceless Title...

It seems from the time we are born, not only are we born into life, but we are born into titles.  As little girls, we are called princess, diva,  queen Bea, and drama queen. Not to say the thousands I haven't mentioned here.  When the pages turn, and we find our self in our adolescent years and discover boys, the title we want the most is girlfriend.  I wasn't allowed to date, a plan my father had right from birth, not until I was ready to marry.  When we skate right into high school; popular, prom queen, and girl friend shot right to the top of our list.  It seemed that it was the most important thing about high school... as for me, I only got one title; Girl Friend.  For some, and even before graduation, finding their mate and shortly after the cap and gown runway display, adding the three letter title was important, Mrs.  I graduated in 1982, and before I knew it.. I was a Mrs.

Not knowing a thing about the world, or myself, I was the Mrs of someone else.  Shortly after the Mrs of someone else, I was Mom.  And then Housewife, and Homemaker took a red eye flight, to insure a morning delivery, to my front door.  It just kept right on growing.  After the birth of my second child, Separated latched right on, and months later I was joined with Divorced.  DWFWC (divorced white female with children) was my new name, and what a mouth full that was.  Talk about scaring off any possibilities of Mr Right (another title) coming along.  When you add DWFWC to Dating, oh yeah, the ride only gets faster and long after you land, your head still spins... hours, weeks, and months after.  So, while carrying around my titles, and in the search of finding the title that was meant for me (Finding Myself had slapped me right in the face about now) I found myself off the dating market for a few months, and then years after.  I had my hands full.  Not only was I DWFWC, I was PDWFWC (Pregnant divorced white female with children).  Why would I even need Mr Right.. A story I often told my self as I pasted on the "I Am Fine" smile that when right along with "I Don't Have Time To Date Anyone".

I am pretty sure, as the world spins and years flashed before my eyes, Divorced could be dropped off my hip.  I mean, isn't there a time frame for titles to be latched on?  Even if you break a mirror, the bad luck only last 7 Years.  The itch is called; 7 year itch, so you know there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  Now, in my Mid Forties title, I am faced with the newest titles I have been given... Nana, Empty Nester, Military Mom, and thankfully Single.  I hadn't heard of the Divorced Title time frame, so I took the liberty to drop it off at the street corner 12 years ago.  What a fun, and some times not so fun, ride it has been.  I wouldn't have traded it for the world. The one Title that always escaped me was the Mrs title.  I always thought I was to busy to let anyone into my little family fully.  3 Grown children and 4 grandchildren later, as I wear my titles daily, I often wonder if there will ever be a Mrs title in my life, or will I carry Single around with me forever.

Is there a Mrs after forty?

1 comment:

  1. I think its the PERFECT time! You can find love because you want to, not because you NEED to! It takes a lot of strength to be a single mom (been there, done that. Although only for a couple years.) Have fun and enjoy the search!